Entry Thirty One: Accepting the reality of death brings light.

When you witness the the passing of a good man - a man that has played what you perceive as a amazing work, from the simplest of things like learning to ride a bike to understanding the universe, and maybe its creator. When you see the pulse stop, the flame leave, the spirit pass, the soul cry out, the fact what he was is no more - reality at twenty years old becomes very bleak or.... for me very optimistic, or a better word ALIVE.

The facts, or maybe emotions, the out of world experiences which you have just been engulfed by makes your head spin to a point where you at the climax wish for death too. You begin to reason with all the other oddities which your five senses have recorded or picked up. Them being words, actions, your mother, father, friends, family, and every other being or concept you have made contact with thus far.

But when seeing death you completely and fully realize our bodies are a cage to a spirit, a entity, a object or "Something" which is very mysterious. That unfortunately, on a individual basis only one of our very limited tools can attempt to describe - words. I say that it is Something that is not apart of our human biology, surely not apart of our "human condition", nor apart of what makes us who we are.... here on earth, now in time, and possibly later.

I have accepted it is as The Spirit, you may see it as an entity or object, but we all see it as a thing beyond any current form of "scientific" explanation. It resides in all of us and at the same time outside of us.... A poor example would be like the Gases in our atmosphere. We breath one of them which gives us life, but it is also apart of a much bigger system and process. Like this Something much more gorgeous, great, and vast then our knowledge of what "this", or "life", or "reality", or " the universe", or "plan" could possibly be.

The same "Something" which everyone I believe has seen through the death of a loved one. Shown to those who have yet to witness, using forms of communication which always underperform the discovery - or awareness. Such as the many forms of english, in different contexts which run under the lines of mythology, philosophy, theology, and now under science, who all equally falter in the attempt to label with pure translation - translation of what we know to be the simple sum of all.